Zywa
I lay awake
Only later I could
play without acting
play the leading role
in my life, my destiny
presorted or coincidental
bad luck on the inside
of my desirable body
loved
without lasting interest
in me, my presence
my desirous spirit
that lay awake
from them, their dreams
which I could not follow
which spurned me
afraid
of the effort that it takes
to change and
not to continue to press
the bruises
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